Depression

Tonight I decided to write about this topic because I have a good friend who has depression and another good friend's youngest son is experiencing it too. It is a common mental health issue that all of us will experience some point in our life journey. I don't think anyone can claim they don't have depression. It is nothing to be ashamed off to admit that we have depression. Life can be very stressful at times and when life becomes too overwhelming we lost control of our emotions. Some of us are luckier that we can recover from depression quickly or by ourselves, but some aren't so lucky to be able to fight off the dark mood. I had been there personally and it was caused by Peter Wittendorp. The feared of losing him sent me on a downward spiral for 1 week in April 2014. I cried daily and I didn't had appetite to eat. My friends were worried about me as they had never seen me like that. But I was very lucky to have them by my side as they gave me their time to talk and listen to me. They reminded me of my worth, my strengths and my attractiveness. They helped me to put things in perspectives and understanding that I didn't do anything wrong that would caused Peter to walkout of my life. And even if he did walked out, I would still be okay as I have always been more than okay without him in my life.

But at that very moment, I lost sight of all my achievements and all I could think of was to be with Peter Wittendorp. It was silly and stupid of me and I was seriously depressed for 1 week when I thought he was going to disappear from my life again. I didn't tell Peter what happened to me as I didn't want to scare him away. Until today he didn't know at all unless he reads this post. And honestly it doesn't matter if he knows or not. Is irrelevant now.

Since I had a short bout of depression, I can relate and understand how it feels. Each person deals with depression differently and some need treatment and medication to make them feel better. 1 of my best friend he has it and he has to see doctor and take medication to help him feels better. His depression was mainly caused by work stress and pressure. He was unhappy working in the company, but because of the need to earn a living he stayed in the job. He fought with the GM, who happened to a bitchy woman who didn't like my friend from day 1 hence she planned and plotted on how to get rid of my friend. And she succeeded because my friend wasn't being careful with his words and actions. She managed to got him fired on some stupid ground. Anyway long story short, he hasn't been himself since then. He isn't working at this moment and when I called him he didn't answer my calls unless I sent him an ultimatum. I  don't know how to help him as he isn't willing to open up to me unless I forced it out of him. I can't keep doing that and I don't want to keep doing that as I know it doesn't helps to make him feel better. He knows himself fairly well. So I hope he will snap out of it soon. 

Another depression story I heard is a good friend's youngest teenage son. His son had always been an A-student throughout most of his school life and when he experienced low grade during his university time he couldn't except the failure and from there he just went downward spiral and didn't want to continue his study. He became aggressive, withdrawn and moody. Video games is his escape and he told his parents that he just want to play video game for the rest of his life and nothing else. He even had attempted to jump down from their condo balcony, but his parents managed to convince  him not to do it. 

His mum is a tiger mum who has a high expectation of him hence it puts more pressure on him  and drive him further into his shell. But his dad, who is a good friend of mine just want his son to be happy and out socialising so that he doesn't hide in the home and play video games only. So he had a father and son talk and he told his son if he study hard and earn good salary he has the freedom to do whatever he wants. And the word freedom was the breakthrough and his son decided to enrol himself in a local university. He even acknowledged he has mental issues and would like to understand himself better. Hence he enrolled in psychology subjects.

Everyone going through depression has different ways to deal with it and the treatment for depression varies from person to person. What is important is to acknowledge we have depression and seek help actively. Is nothing to be ashamed off to have depression. Is part and parcel of our life journey. 

I'm lucky because I'm a very positive and strong person so with good friends helped and support I was able to pull myself out of the sink hole. No man is worth me sacrificing my health for him no matter how much I might love him. And I loved Peter Wittendorp with all my heart. I did. Anyway is history.

So for those who is going through depression don't hide yourself, but instead try to talk to someone and always focus on the positive. Temporary setback in life is not the end of the world. Remind yourself that no matter how tough your life is now, it will pass. I know it is easier to say than to do it, but you have to try. You never know what is just around the corner. Tune your mind to focus on happy thoughts and memories. Don't let your mind to play tricks on you. Don't dwell in negative thoughts. Life is beautiful and colorful. Don't miss out on it! 

I wish those who are experiencing depression now to recover and pull themselves out of the rut soon.