Colleagues

1 of my colleague is leaving the company next week and moving to Melbourne so we had a farewell happy hour with him. It was a good night bonding with my colleagues. 1 of the thing I enjoy most from my work is my colleagues. I have nice and easy going colleagues. And also the team work. They are also funny too. I learned a lot more about them tonight and what I found out were interesting. Hahaha.

And I can say with 100% certainty that I don't judge because the things I heard were juicy. I respect everyone's choice and beside I'm not a judge, so it is not my place to judge at all. And their choices are not affecting me directly so why should I pass judgment. But I'm definitely curious to know their reasons. Human thinking and behaviour are the most interesting subject to study! Haha

They came up to my condo to use the washroom and commented that my place is big for me to stay. Haha. 1 colleague even commented that he feels motivated to work harder after seeing my place. I rarely invite people to come to my place because it is my sanctuary. Anyway, it was nice to have my colleagues visit my home.

I enjoy their company :-)!

Updated on 20.6.16

If I have to pick 1 good thing from working in JLL, it will be my colleagues. Nice people and non judgmental. We work in harmony and appreciate team spirit. Whenever I'm in a lousy mood, it will be lifted when I go in to office as 1 of my colleague, James, will say something funny or share some funny stories about his clients that just cracked me up. Haha. I asked James a few days ago if he thinks I can survive in corporate structure and he said no. Haha!

Cheeky me

I miss my own cheekiness! I was so caught up with the drama in his life and his paranoia, he suck all my positive energy out from me. Including my sense of humour and cheekiness! I can feel my old self returning. Haha!

Hmmm.......should I share some of the juicy stuffs we talked about and did with my readers? Hahahahaha! He is going to have a heart attack and be very furious if he reads this post!! Lol! He will probably believes that I will definitely write it! Well, no decision yet as on this topic. Stay tune and follow my blog to find out and be the first to know :-)!

Damn, it feels good to be cheeky especially at his expense!! I'm the type of person if you don't want me to do something, speak to me nicely and explain to me why and I will listen. If you use threat or blackmail or arm twist me, then I will definitely do the opposite of what you want :-)! And he never wants to talk about issues openly or listen, then reading is the only way. He brought a side of me that has been dormant for a long long time.

Psychology said, emotional pain does change or affect a person behaviour. I'm mirroring his actions in a way! Another thought just came to mind - he probably think I have gone off the chart and acting crazy :-)! I'm always crazy and he knows that!! hahahaha!

Oh well, too bad if he doesn't likes it.....he did a lot of things I didn't like, but he still went ahead to do it. Now let him has a taste of his own medicine! What goes around comes around! Treat people how you want to be treated! Before we complain about what we don't like about someone, please ask ourselves why the people are treating us this way compare to others. Don't blame the other person. Instead look within yourself and own up your faults like a real man or woman :-)!

Anyway, I'm sleepy.....Happy Friday to all my readers!

His pics

I was going thru my photo albums to delete any unwanted photos and unexpectedly his face popped onto my screen. I didn't expect to still have his photos as I had deleted it from my phone. I guess it was backup before I deleted it and I never realised until I cleaned up my iCloud. It brought back some memories - both good and bad. At first when I saw his pics, I was taken a back and all the harsh and mean words he said to me came rushing back and hit me like a tsunami. I looked at his face and I was like .....who is this man in the picture? For 2 full years, we had a lot of happy memories and lots of laughter. Ratio 70 (happy):30 (sad). But now it is all gone!! Thanks to him!

After the initial anger and hurt, the happy memories came flooding back into my mind too. The wiseass and sarcastic jokes he cracked, he cheered me up when I was down and unhappy, he stepped out to call me when I told him I needed to talk to him, his teasings and when he reminded 6x a day to go and see a doctor when I was sick. I miss this side of him. The carefree, big kid and silly sides of him.

Of course with happy memories, there were tons of bad and sad memories too. Which I wouldn't dwell on it as I don't want to get myself upset again.

I couldn't help wondering did he tried to reach out to me in the past 2 weeks or he just can't be bothered at all?? I wouldn't know because I block him on my phone so even if he did, I wouldn't get any messages or missed calls from him. I told him I have unblocked him and I did, for 2 days, and I block him again. Why? Because I don't want to get any unexpected harsh and mean messages from him especially when I'm writing about us openly. I can guess his reactions and I don't want to deal with his ugly side. If he asks nicely, I might explain my reasons.

But at this moment, I'm not sure if I'm ready to deal with him. I'm experiencing mix feeling for him now. I want to forgive him and reach out, but I couldn't bring myself to do it because he never apologise for his behaviour and ask nicely what he can do to redeem himself. Knowing him, he will start pointing finger at me again. Haha!

So in the end I decided to continue to block him. If he really wants to reach me, he has other avenue. But just not thru phone. If he reads this post, he will be paranoid again.....about the pics of him I still keep. He might worry I will post it up on my blog for the world to see. If I really want to expose his identity, I would have done it way earlier and not now. Anyway, he can thinks whatever he likes and wants. I don't control his mind.

So will I ever post his pics?? Hmmmmm...............not answering :-)!!

Real Estate

Been in the real estate profession for 14 years now including the 2 years sabbatical I took to open and run my restaurant. And towards end of last year I decided it was time to go back to the work force because I got bored and tired doing nothing in the daytime. Haha. So here I am, back into the playing ground amidst the tougher market conditions. Having said that, I think there are also some very good opportunities in the market currently. Some days I'm excited, but some days I'm not especially when I need to drag my ass off to bed and go into office for my weekly meeting. Or when I have to spend time doing paperworks and schedule reporting! I'm still trying to get use to it as I'm an entrepreneur. But then again, it is one of the reason I joined a corporate company. To challenge myself. Hahaha! Definitely not for the salary as it isn't much compare to what I used to make, but it is a trade off in return for different experiences, different learning curves and an opportunity to achieve my next dream :-)!

The 1 thing I love about being in the real estate is the unpredictability. I don't know what the next call will brings me - super good news or not so good news :-)! I enjoy the adrenalin rush of closing a difficult deal although it stresses me out. Hahahaha! The satisfaction that comes from it is immense. Personal satisfaction and achievement.

I told my boss the other day if I want to climb up the corporate ladder and play the corporate game, I will be at the top of my game in no time. But I'm not chasing the corporate ladder. I hate the stuffy and structure corporate world. Unless it is a place like Facebook or Tesla or Apple. I want to work in a corporate company that encourages creativity and allow outspokenness. My current company is a great company and people are nice, but just too by the book for me. I just wish to have more freedom and luckily my boss gives me that or I wouldn't be able to last too long.

But so far, I can still manage. I enjoy working with my colleagues. Very open, friendly and helpful. We work as a team and I like that a lot. I don't need to worry about them undercutting my deal or vice versa. Not an experience that I will be able to enjoy in another company. 

Anyway, my goal for this year is to sell an en-bloc office building. Not an easy challenge, but nevertheless I will do my best to make my goal comes true. Wish me luck :-)!

Tolerate cheating

I'm surrounded by successful women who put up with and tolerate their cheating, lying and abusive husband. Some even blamed themselves for their shitty husband behaviours and continue to forgive and accept them back into their life. The women reasons are the kids need their dad or financially it is better to have the abusive, cheating lying husband around than his absence. Some of the husbands were not only lying and cheating, but also verbally and physically abusive to the wife and yet she welcomed him back into the house and onto the bed, sleeping next to him on a daily basis.

I really don't understand why a successful, financially secure and decent looking wife is willing to put up with the husband abusive and shitty behaviour? Is this really love? Or is it fear of raising the kids alone? Or is it the fear of public stigma and being label a failure? Where do these women find the strength to forgive?? Some of these husbands don't deserve even deserve a 2nd chance, but were given and the same shits happened again. It was like groundhog day, history repeated itself.

Some of these husbands were not only lying and cheating, they even accused the wife of cheating and  started to scheme and plan to exact revenge and began their cheating quest. They created stories that were so believing, even perfecting their act until the other woman fell for their sob stories. They could mastered their pain and hurt so well that the other woman could actually felt the man pain and hurst caused by the so called cheating wife and couldn't find any loophole in their stories. The cheating man used the other woman's trust in him and played with her feeling. Once a woman trust a man, she will trust him until he gives her reason to doubt and questions his trusts for him!

The cheating and lying husband could be so great in acting that he should be given an Oscar for his excellent acting skills.  Hahahaha!! The cheating and lying husband even told the other woman, "if she isn't the mother of my son she would not have gotten away with her shits"......and this wasn't the 1st time the cheating husband said or hinted that he would get a divorce. A woman in love will never question the honesty and sincerity of the man she's with because she never thought that the man she respected and cherished would be so good at playing mind game, scheming, planning and executing such a massive lie just to cheat!! To accuse his own wife of cheating.....that will never cross any women mind. The man not only lied to his wife, but he also lied to himself and the other woman he cheated with. And yet when shits hit the fan, the other woman is to be blamed, but not the cheating husband that created and cooked up such a twisted and massive lie and sob story just to make himself better for cheating!!

And the wife after finding out the half truth, decided to accept and forgive the cheating and lying husband back into her life and onto her bed. I'm a woman myself. I know how weak and soft-hearted women can be. I know how much craps and shits we could take and tolerate before we put down our feet and say enough is enough!! I know we hope that the incident was a one-off and time will heal the wound and my life will be back to normal again. I know we don't want to lose and feel like a failure because we are successful in our career, so how could we feel in our personal life?

As women, we will convince ourselves that for the sake of kids and financial, we should at least give that cheating and lying man another chance to repent himself. Some women are lucky to have their husband back and their marriage lasted till they die. Some are not so lucky. But think about it, how could a wife accept the facts that she doesn't knows what her husbands think anymore? How could she sleeps next to a man that made a vow not to hurt, lie and cheat on her did all that? Doesn't she feel scare sleeping next to a man who promised to protect her, but in the end broke her heart and trust and caused her immense pain and she still called it LOVE???

The man she married turns into a stranger and yet she called it LOVE?? Hmmmm........only women will put up and tolerate those shits mentioned above. All the above are true stories told to me by people I know. I don't judge and definitely don't have any right to judge their choice and decision, but as a woman I do feel dumbfounded at times with our own actions and behaviours. Hahahaha!

Anyway, I guess it is a woman's gift and also a curse to be tolerating. I'm one of the guilty ones too, until I couldn't accept it anymore! Or when my threshold is breached. Everyone of us has something in us that we won't tolerate and I found out what's mine few weeks ago.

Point for women to ponder :-)!!!!

Memories by Peter Wittendorp

Although the time we spent together were very limited, but he gave me a few funny memories. He could really be a big kid in private and so much fun. For instance, last year March in HK, I didn't expect him to be back so soon as he said he would finished his work around evening so I went out to met my best friend for coffee. When I got back around 4ish pm, he was already in the room. But I didn't see him immediately when I entered the room and he didn't greet me at all. He was seated at the work table to my right and as I entered the room I walked straight up to the living room sofa, put my handbag on the coffee table and saw him when I turned around going for my in room slippers. I got a shocked when I first saw him and asked him why he didn't said hello, he said he wanted to observe me. And then he burst out laughing at me being blur. Haha

Second funny incident was he stood behind the sheer curtain and looked out to me. He looked like a pervert but it was really a funny scene. I laughed until my belly ached. Oh....another good one was he imitated an ape with the sound and the action when I told him he looked like one because he is hairy. Hahahaha! To see a 49 years old man acting silly was really a happy side. I missed that.

His sweet moments were when he sat at the edge of the bath tub and watched me put on my make up, getting ready to go out for dinner. It was kinda weird as I wasn't used to letting a man looking at me putting on make up, but it was really sweet too. He also arranged my clothes neatly. Haha. Which was a surprised to me. But my most favourite was when he kissed my forehead before leaving for work as I was still half asleep. It warmed my heart and made me felt loved and protected. At that moment, I could felt he was genuine and his feeling for me was real. Fast forward today, a 180 degree changed. We always said that no matter what happened, we would always be friends because we knew each other since 10 years ago. But very unfortunate, he destroyed our friendship single handedly.

Anyway.....there were more sexy moments too, but won't share :-)!! Hahahaha

If he reads this, he will goes ballistic! Because he wants our memories be just ours and not share with the world. In the past I would listened to him, but not anymore. I'm a fair person. Everything has to be reciprocated. Beside, he is no longer in my life so why should I care about what he wants. He never did cared about me. Treat people how you want to be treated!

To My Internet Harasser

To whoever is harassing me on the internet and by emails, if harassing me makes your life more meaningful and liveable, please continue. But I won't allow your bullying tactic and harassing to affect my life. I feel so so sorry for you that your life is so miserable and pathetic that you need to go around to make other people life miserable too. Anyway.....you will never win. I'm not going to lose anything significant so go ahead and continue targeting me if it makes your life worth more living.

This is my last post about this topic so you won't get anymore attention from me.

Pins to describe my feelings

I believe in all the above quotes!

Ya, he taught and used me at the same time! He used me to escape his problems rather than facing and solving the issues. When I called him out on it, he always managed to turn around to make me felt guilty for it. 

So true. My trust for him is (-100%) now

Hahaha!! 1 person comes to mind overtime I read this pin - HIM!!

I think he does now!! Do I care? If I give a shit, I wouldn't be posting. I told him many times, if I want to do something, I will do it openly and publicly as me! I'm not a coward. I don't need to hide behind a mask! Moreover, whatever I wrote about him so far are facts. I had warned him that I will write until I don't feel anything for him anymore. 

I told him I will ask my future lover to write a thank you card for helping me to become a better woman for myself and for my future lover. 

Hmm.......in my dream only!! Maybe not also!! LOL

Ya, couldn't agree more. He hurts my feeling so many times until I could actually felt the pain in my heart. It never crossed my mind that he would be so mean, harsh, cold and selfish!! Never in the 10 years I know him, especially the last 2 years when we grew so close and I thought he genuinely open up to me. But I was a fool! He promised me so many times he would never hurt me, but he did.

Peter Wittendorp's February Visit

Never thought that when I saw him end of February this year was our last dinner together. When I first saw him walking out from the hotel lobby, I got a shock as he looked old, haggard, sad, stress and very unhappy. He aged so much compared to last year. He grew a beard too and it made him looked even older. I was so surprised and shocked to see him in such a physical state. I took him to my restaurant for lunch as he wanted to try my food and checked out the place. Lunch was subdued as a lot were weighing on his mind.....including saying sorry to me for lying. He did and I accepted it.  He didn't want to tell my anything, although initially he said he would. He said best I don't know and I agreed with him as I really don't want to know even until now. He told me during lunch that he respected me and valued our friendship, therefore he flew to KL to apologise in person. I knew he was sincere in trying to make amend. That's why it is so hard for me to understand how he could be so mean and harsh to me? And to think so deviously of me?? How could a person became another person in a span of 2 months?

Anyway, looking at him so stressed out and unhappy, all I wanted to do was to cheer him up. I just liked to see him smile and laugh gaily. I missed his smart ass jokes and teasing. I thought of ways to cheer him up, but I didn't manage to until evening time when we had a few drinks. Even during then he was still quiet, but a bit loosen up. I couldn't remember what we talked about, mainly casual topics. We avoided talking about the internet harassment. At that point I still didn't have any idea what is going on in his life. He just gave me snippets of it. We had dinner at Prime and I was still trying to cheer him up and made him laughed. This time I succeeded. He said it was actually good to get out of the house for awhile. He said he was grumpy and quiet at home too. I was so not used to this side of him. Maybe because I'm a happy go lucky person irregardless how bad a situation is, I always choose to think positively. He said I'm bubbly!

After dinner we had tea. And that was when he started to act like a big kid. Unexpectedly he threw cube sugar at me and laughed at his own action. I threw it back at him and missed. He took away the sugar container before I could reached for a second cube. Haha! We were acting like a kid in public, but I was happy to see him laughed. He promised me that the next time he visits me again, he will be his usual happy self again and better company. But now it won't happen anymore.

We both had a hand in destroying our friendship by acting without thinking and speaking without tasting our own words before it left our mouth. Now it is too late to take it back. Intentionally or not, the damage was done. I don't know why I'm writing this post. Maybe I don't want to give myself a chance to let him walk back into my life. Or maybe I want him to be so pissed off after reading this post that he will hate me. Or maybe because I have nothing to hide. Nothing to be ashamed of. My life is an open book so no one can use anything against me! I won't allow it. Rebellious streak in me. The more I'm threatened, the less scare I will be!!

Anyway.......life is too unpredictable to spend my time worrying. If shit hits the fan, then I will deal with it then!

My Playground - Nexo Restaurant & Bar

My baby, my playground, my pride and joy, will not be mine anymore starting from July. 29 months of owning and running this restaurant and tonight I bade farewell to it with a few good friends. Next month onwards it will belongs to a new owner. We sold the restaurant to a Korean couple lock, stock and barrel.

This restaurant gave me a lot of great memories. Our pre-opening was on Jan 10th 2014. We rushed to open because we had an ex HK TVB Artist, Kate Tsui (picture below), coming to attend a friend birthday dinner which was held at Nexo. I could still remember that we were all rushing and working till very late the night before the event to make sure everything were in placed. And our furnitures were delayed so we had to use rented furniture. It was crazy and exciting at the same time.
There were some hiccups on that night, but overall it was a good night and it was a privilege to have Kate Tsui as our 1st guest of honour.

Subsequently, I had the opportunities to meet a few more HK celebrities thanks to my younger brother's connection. Below were a few of the celebrities. 

Ron Ng Cheuk Hei & I

Ron Ng, Tavia Yeung (white dress) & Nancy Wu (yellow dress)

Without the restaurant, I wouldn't had the opportunities to host them and be closed up to them. They looked pretty and handsome even without any make up. 

Aside from HK celebrities, I had also made a lot of new friends, expanding my circle of friends and enriching my life. Some of these friends will be lifelong friends. Aside from friendship, I also learned how to enjoy fine wines, good whiskeys, brandy and good food. And most importantly, my dream of owning a restaurant and bar is fulfilled and checked off my bucket lists.

A lot of people said I was crazy to open a restaurant and bar as F&B is a tough business and even more tougher for me because I didn't had any experienced prior to Nexo so me and my partners we literally jumped in blind. We made so many mistakes and learned from it. It became my full-time job, but without a salary. So for 2 full years, not only I didn't get any salary, I also need to pump in more money to the restaurant to keep it afloat. And finally, we decided it was time to give up as we couldn't  think of any more ways to stabilise the business.

It had also became too stressful for me, worrying about the business, sales and expenses. I was the one who ran the entire business and I just got fed up and tired. We lost substantial money, but I have no regret. It doesn't scare me away from still wanting to own a restaurant & bar in the future. I still want to have a place of my own to hangout with my friends and make more new friends. I will be smarter and prepared in my next F&B venture. 

So this is just a temporary goodbye from F&B industry. I SHALL BE BACK :-)!! 

Thank you to all my regular clients and friends who supported us since our opening. You guys had gave me a lot of memorable and wonderful experienced. I shall end this post by sharing an article reviewed on Nexo.

http://www.star2.com/food/eating-out/2015/06/07/nexo-is-pork-paradise/

I look terrible in the picture. Haha. No make up plus strong light ;-)! Anyway, I'm very proud of myself because I fulfilled my dream! No regret!