Sunday, October 30, 2016

My favourite guy

Captain Cool, my favourite guy at the moment 😂. He always managed to crack me up with his silliness and wise ass remarks! Oh oh, I love to hear his deep manly voice. Is such a turn on for me 😍! With him, I can be very blunt and upfront and I know he doesn't feel offended. Most of the times we forgot what we told each other hence never any hard feelings. And if I feel any negativity building up inside me, I will tell him and stay away until the negativity is gone. I don't want to take it out on him because I don't think it is fair. It is my negative emotions hence I need to take care of it myself without involving anyone. I have learned a lot in the past 3 months on how to truly live an open life and communicate my feelings and thoughts openly without holding back. Is still work in progress, but I see tremendous improvements in my relationship with people, from strangers to business partners to friends and family. I realised that there are people out there who are like me and appreciate my honesty and bluntness rather than told me not to be too blunt or take offend easily. I can use any words I like and want without having to worry about that person feel offended. 
It is truly liberating to be able to be blunt and honest with people. I'm not everyone cup of tea and is fine. I don't want to be everyone cup of tea. Haha. Chris has shown me what I truly want from a lover, be it full time or part-time. He brought out the creative side of me and he enjoys my mental energy as much as I enjoy his. With Chris, I have learned to chill and not be bothered by the unknown. I used to ask a lot of personal questions, but now I let it be. The less I ask, the more info he volunteered and sometimes I really don't want to know at all. I don't want to get too addicted to him when he is just a part-time lover and not a full-time lover. I don't want to absorb anyone negative energy and drama anymore therefore the less I know the better I feel 😀!
At this juncture, Chris is definitely my favourite part-time lover. When will I feel bored with him, I don't know yet. When will he feel bored with me, I don't know too. Haha. But I have a feeling he won't feel bored with me for awhile 😂😝! I'm able to step back and give him his space anytime he wants it. I don't hold on to what we have. Instead I just go with the flow and see where it takes me.
I told him this afternoon to take his headspace anytime he wants and comes back to me when he is in the right frame of mind as me. I don't enjoy chatting with him when we aren't on the same wavelength. Yes, I do miss our daily chats when I don't hear from him, but is ok. Sometimes too much of something will make me sick too. So occasionally I need to reduce the doses of him in order for me and him to last longer. 
If Chris misses me, he will reach out. If he doesn't, then he doesn't. Life still goes on. My life doesn't revolve around him or waiting for him to call or text me. I enjoy his presence, but I'm also ok without it. After my last experienced, I find that going with the flow is just the way to go. People come, people go. Why get so hung up on 1 particular person when there are 7 billion people in the universe 😉! 

No comments:

Post a Comment